Have you ever woke up and realized, "Holy baloney, I'm grown up." It seriously seems like last week my life consisted of homework, lacrosse games and organizing cards at Hallmark. But in reality, last week consisted of the start of my first born's swim lessons, hanging up pictures in the house we just bought and celebrating my husband of five years' first Father's Day with our son AND daughter. Wait just a minute. That all sounds like things that grown ups do, and I'm still just a kid... right? So here's one of my biggest challenges of being an adult...
You've heard the saying, "children don't come with an instruction manual". Which is, of course, very true. You don't realize how true until you have children of your own. An instruction manual would be nice, but each child is different so I'm thinking, it might be a little unreliable. So how about a book of things not to do. To avoid. Remember the movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days? How about How to Royally Screw Up Your Child in 18 Years. That would be helpful. And here's my first topic suggestion: threats. Don't freak out! I'm not talking about scary ones. But here's what I've learned from experience.
-Threat that works: "If you're not good, Santa won't bring you any presents." Behavior usually improves, even if just momentarily, until the next Santa reminder.
-Threat that doesn't: (After hearing sirens outside) "That's the nap police that are coming to get you if you don't go take a nap." Cue hysterical and panicked freakout.
Oh yeah. I'm still having to play recon and teach E that the police are good guys and the ones to go to when you need help. Oops.
So to my child I say, sorry kid. I'm just an adult. I don't have all the answers. One day you'll be a grown up & a parent, have no idea what you're doing and make little mistakes like that too. Maybe by then there will be a what-not-to-do type of manual for you.
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